I just realized something a few days ago...I haven't cried since I had my last chemo. I used to have bad moments every few days where I would freak out and get really upset about this whole process...it even happened the night before my last chemo treatment. I would feel an overwhelming sadness, frustration and anger about everything. So it was an amazing feeling to realize that I haven't felt that awful feeling in a while.
I'm still on pins and needles though as I continue to monitor my health with PET scans and doctor visits. It's kind of a scary time to be done with treatment and hoping and praying that the medicine did it's job and I never have to worry about it again. I keep looking towards the future, thinking about how I will feel about everything a month from now, 2 months from now, 6 months from now.
Meanwhile, my 2nd blog on Carolina Bride has been posted here! Since this audience doesn't know me and is new to my story, I'm taking them back to the first few days of my diagnosis and telling my story from there. Speaking of weddings, I feel like I need to get moving on some plans...we've chosen the venue but I need to work on the next step. Theknot.com now sends me emails on the 4th of every month, reminding me how much time we have left until our wedding date and how many hundreds of things we have to do before the day. Even though I know we have tons of time, I have to admit those emails stress me out! So I need to work on some wedding stuff to make myself feel like I'm getting things done and my inner Bridezilla doesn't come out--yet at least! Time's a tickin..